Here are 5 clues your ex still wants you back and how you can use this information to Get Back Together with your ex.

1. The number one clue your ex wants you back is if they are single or make it a point to remain single. If it seems your ex is avoiding moving on, it could be that you hold a firm place in their heart and they are waiting for the perfect moment to get you back. If you want to get back together with your ex, and no one else seems to be good enough for your ex, it could be that no one can compare to you.

2. If your ex wants to become friends with you, if they spend a lot of time with you and enjoy your company, if they treat you like a really good friend and if they show you respect and attention it could mean that he or she really craves a relationship but fears rejection or doesn’t know how to approach you. You may want to say or do something to encourage your ex to make the next move, if you want to get back together with them.

3. If your ex is calling you regularly, if they remember the important things like your birthday, if they call or contact you for no reason it could be that they need to be around you and keep some kind of connection with you. It could mean that they can’t stop thinking about you, which is why they can’t stop calling or emailing you.

4. If your ex has become nosy, if your ex wonders where you are or who you’re with, if your ex seems jealous, annoyed or defensive when you bring up someone else or if a friend asks who you are seeing, it could mean your ex hates hearing about you being with anyone else but them.

5. When your ex shows remorse or regret concerning you or the relationship, or when your ex reminisces about the past as though he or she made a terrible mistake, it could mean that your ex actually feels that way and hates that they stupidly let you go. When you want to get Your Ex Back, you may want to give a hint that you miss the relationship, as well, so your ex will know they have the okay to move forward with you.

More Getting Ex Back Articles

Technorati Tags: back, clue, Clues, contact, Fears, feeling the same way, friends, good friend, heart, important things, lot, moving, Perfect Moment, reason, rejection, relationship, remorse, Respect, second chance, Signals, STILL, together, Wants

While this is true, it doesn’t mean that there aren’t men and women who don’t want to Get Back Together with their ex. A lot of us are afraid of rejection from our ex and so we convince ourselves that there’s nothing that can be done to save the relationship.

We also resort to our friends and family members for advice only to be told that we should forget about the relationship and our ex. We take their advice forgetting the fact that it isn’t our friends or family members who have spent years and decades even in a relationship with our ex.

We have to remember that we know more about our ex than our friends and family members, or anybody on the internet and thats why we should give the relationship we have with our ex a second chance. Also, in relationships we build a bond and connection to our partner.

We create memories that are impossible to forget, and we share personal things about ourselves with our partner that no other person in the world knows but them. Don’t throw your relationship with your ex only to move on and share your mind and body all over again with someone else.

If you are someone who can’t stop thinking “I want my ex back now,” what you need to know is that your ex wants to see that you can maturely handle the break up and that you have the stability to still live your life after it.

A lot of men and women do things like calling and texting their ex several times a day, they flood their ex with gifts, and they smother their ex by showing up at places they know their ex will be, worst of which being their job.

This is no way to get Your Ex Back in your arms. What you need to do is get a proven system to get your ex back or you should give your ex time to be alone. Let them be by themselves for a week or two before you contact them to talk about the problems you both feel ended the relationship.

After the two of you can identify those problems, then the two of you should talk about what you both can do to fix them together. This is what you should do if you are in a “I want my ex back” situation.

Technorati Tags: back, decades, family members, Flood, Football Stadiums, friends and family, Gifts, HELP, Here's, job, lot, memories, men and women, Mind And Body, personal things, proven system, rejection, relationship, relationships, second chance, several times, situation, Smother, want, Women In The World, youre

I am so sorry that you have to go through this break up, it hurts and it is hard. But even if you are the only one that wants to continue this relationship right now, there is ways you can change your ex mind about that. Even if you had a though even “ugly” breakup there is ways for you to have a future with your ex.

The answer to the question “can I get back my ex?” is definitely YES. You just need to know how. You need to know what to say and do.

Can I get back my ex? What to say and do:

Get back my ex – agree with the breakup. What you need to do (even if you do not agree with it) is accept and agree with the break up. This is the only way for you to be able to move on and in the end win you ex back. You need to let your ex know that you thought a lot about it and that you agree that being apart right now, is the best thing for both of you. Do this in a calm controlled way.

Get back my ex – make yourself “unavailable”. Before you can ever win back your ex you have to let him/her go. It will not work with text messages, phone calls and visits at this point. What you need is a break from each other. You need to make yourself “unavailable” for your ex, this will give your ex the opportunity to miss you. So do not call do not text message, do not visit do not contact your ex in any way.

If your ex contacts you be nice but short. Tell your ex that you are busy but you will get back with him/her later. The truth is we want what we can not have…

Get back my ex – feel, look and be your best. We do not want to be with people who are depressed, desperate or unhealthy. We want to be with happy, healthy, fun motivated people right? So take care of yourself, do things that you enjoy. Go out with your friends, do things that makes you feel good. Be the best person that you can.

Remember when you met your ex? Why did you fall in love with him/her and why did he/she fall in love with you? Remember why and you will be able to get that again, you just need to find out what to say and do to get Your Ex Back

Technorati Tags: back, contact, Contacts, Fall In Love, lot, Met, opportunity, Phone Calls, Proven, relationship, Show, text message, text messages, truth, ways

This particular cliché is actually more biblically accurate than the six I previously listed, because it attempts to affirm God’s love for sinners while at the same time upholding His holiness. Yet like the six clichés I listed last month, this one also falls short of the full truth, and it can thus be misleading to people and damaging to Christ’s cause. Why do I say this? One reason is because Scripture not only teaches that God loves sinners, but also that He hates them. Surprised? Read for yourself:

The boastful shall not stand before Your eyes; You hate all who do iniquity. You destroy those who speak falsehood; the Lord abhors the man of bloodshed and deceit (Ps. 5:5-6, emphasis added).

The Lord tests the righteous and the wicked, and the one who loves violence His soul hates (Ps. 11:5, emphasis added).

I have forsaken My house, I have abandoned My inheritance; I have given the beloved of My soul [God’s people Israel] into the hand of her enemies. My inheritance has become to Me like a lion in the forest; she has roared against Me; therefore I have come to hate her (Jer. 12:7-8, emphasis added).

All their evil is at Gilgal; indeed, I came to hate them there! Because of the wickedness of their deeds I will drive them out of My house! I will love them no more; all their princes are rebels (Hos. 9:15, emphasis added).

These verses of scripture are all in your Bible as well as mine! Your Bible declares that God hates “all who do iniquity” (Ps. 5:5). Since all unregenerate people “do iniquity,” we can conclude that God hates them all. (Incidentally, this verse among many others leads us to believe that God’s “free gift of righteousness” is more than just a legal standing of righteousness that results in no practical righteousness, otherwise God would hate His own children.)

But how can it be true that God both loves and hates sinners? The only way to reconcile this apparent contradiction is to once again recognize that not all love is the same. As I stated in last month’s e-teaching, some love is conditional, what I referred to as “approving love,” and some love is unconditional, what I referred to as “merciful love.” From the standpoint of His merciful love, God loves sinners (see Eph. 2:4-6; Tit. 3:5; 1 Pet. 1:3, and look for the word mercy). But from the standpoint of his approving love, God utterly hates them—they are in fact abhorrent to Him. Can you imagine how you would feel if you had created a race of people who inwardly knew just how to please you yet who ignored and disobeyed you continually, even using your name as a curse word? Might you not be somewhat upset with them?

Note that all of the above-quoted scriptures do not say that God only hates what people do—they say He hates them.We cannot separate a person from what he does.What a person does reveals his character—who he is. Thus if God disapproves of sin He of course must disapprove of sinners. God is so pure that His disapproval is very strong, and the word hate describes it well.To separate the sin from the sinner by saying “God loves the sinner but hates the sin” is potentially misleading.

Other scriptures declare that certain people—not just what those people do—are an abomination to God.See, for example, Deut. 22:5, 16; Lev. 26:29-30; Ps. 5:5-6; Prov. 3:32, 11:20, 16:5, 17:15. Beyond that, there are many other expressions of God’s hatred of certain people in Scripture. For example, when we read, “the Lord did not turn from the fierceness of His great wrath with which His anger burned against Judah” (2 Kin. 23:26), we don’t get the impression that we are reading about God’s love for sinners.

Regrettably,very little is said of God’s hatred or abhorrence of sinners among modern Christians. Most preachers, it seems, emphasize God’s love for sinners, and their audiences consequently are often misled into thinking that God approves of them in spite of their sin, which couldn’t be further from the truth. The truth is that God utterly hates them, but He is mercifully giving them time to repent and gain His approval before they die, and only in that sense does He love them. When they die His mercy ends, and they will then experience the fullness of His hatred. The people in hell do not think that God loves them. They all know that He utterly hates them. And the truth is that when they were alive He hated them just as thoroughly, but then He showed them mercy, or merciful love. If unrepentant people who are still alive knew how much God hates them, they would be astounded at His merciful love towards them.

This also indicates to us that God’s holy hatred of sinners and His merciful love toward them are not contradictory aspects of His character. Rather, they perfectly blend together. God’s mercy is magnified even more by His holy hatred, and vice versa. Preachers who want to emphasize God’s true love for sinners must first emphasize His holy hatred for them.

If the history of revival teaches us anything, it teaches us that revival occurs when people are awakened, not to some false concept of a grandfather God who “loves everyone unconditionally,” but when they realize their present precarious condition before a holy and wrathful God. For example,Puritan preacher Jonathan Edwards, whom God used as a instrument of revival during America’s Great Awakening in the 1740s, certainly didn’t mislead his congregation about their slippery state before God. In his classic sermon, Sinners in the Hands of an Angry God, Edwards simply affirmed biblical truth about God’s attitude toward the unrepentant:

The God that holds you over the pit of hell, much as one holds a spider, or some loathsome insect over the fire, abhors you, and is dreadfully provoked: his wrath towards you burns like fire; he looks upon you as worthy of nothing else, but to be cast into the fire; he is of purer eyes than to bear to have you in his sight; you are ten thousand times more abominable in his eyes, than the most hateful venomous serpent is in ours. You have offended him infinitely more than ever a stubborn rebel did his prince; and yet it is nothing but his hand that holds you from falling into the fire every moment….O sinner! Consider the fearful danger you are in: it is a great furnace of wrath, a wide and bottomless pit, full of the fire of wrath, that you are held over in the hand of that God, whose wrath is provoked and incensed as much against you, as against many of the damned in hell. You hang by a slender thread, with the flames of divine wrath flashing about it, and ready every moment to singe it, and burn it asunder…

What a picture of God’s anger and His mercy! Although Jonathan Edwards witnessed wonderful revival in his church and community, he was ultimately dismissed from his pastorate for holding to his biblical convictions. Only preachers who truly love their audiences and who aren’t afraid of losing popularity and money can possibly preach such truth. Of course, Jesus was one of those kinds of preachers. Never once did He tell an unsaved audience that God loved them, and there is only one record of His telling one unregenerate individual one time about God’s love for the world (and that is found in John 3:16). Rather, Jesus regularly warned sinners of God’s wrath and called them to repentance (see, for example, Matt. 4:17; 5:22, 29-30, 8:11-12; 10:28; 11:20-23; 13:41-42, 49-50; 18:19; 22:13; 23:33; 24:50-51; 25:30). What Jesus told one person one time we have made our universal theme to the unsaved, and what He constantly emphasized to them we have kept a secret! Are we really being seeker-sensitive with our non-offensive evangelistic sermons, or are we actually ashamed of Jesus and His words? (See Luke 9:26.) Why are so many pastors afraid to tell the biblical truth even to professing Christians in the church? What does that reveal about those pastors? What does that reveal about their congregations?

John the Baptist, whom Jesus called the greatest man who ever lived (Matt. 11:11), never mentioned God’s love when he preached the gospel (see Matt. 3:1-12; Luke 3:1-18). He sounded much like Jonathan Edwards, warning his audiences of God’s coming wrath. Likewise, there is not a single case in the book of Acts where anyone preaching the gospel told an unsaved audience that God loved them. Rather, the biblical preachers warned their audiences that God did not approve of them, that they were in danger, and that they needed to make dramatic changes in their lives. Had they only told their audiences that God loved them and all they need to do was “accept Christ as Savior” (as do so many modern ministers), they may have misled them into thinking that God approved of them, that they were in no danger, were not storing up wrath for themselves, and had no need to repent. This is of vital importance, because salvation cannot occur without repentance. Jesus told His apostles to “preach repentance for the forgiveness of sins” (Luke 24:47). We may be filling churches with evangelistic messages about God’s love, but are we filling heaven?

God’s love is greatly distorted when modern preachers, under the influence of pop psychology (whether they realize it or not) tell their unsaved audiences how Christ’s death proves their value before God. “You were worth dying for” they say. Even the Parable of the Pearl of Great Price is perverted to show supposedly that Christ gave up everything to gain what was of inestimable value—us! (Wasn’t God blessed to get YOU?) Paul, however, stood amazed, not at how the cross proved the alleged value of a race of rebels, but how it displayed God’s amazing merciful love, because Jesus wasn’t dying for good people, but for ungodly sinners(see Rom. 5:6-10). His death saved us, not from underestimating our true worth, but from God’s righteous wrath that we all fully deserve(see Rom. 5:6-10). Apart from God’s holy hatred of sinners, His love for them is essentially meaningless.

Why don’t we follow the example of Jesus and John the Baptist, telling the unrepentant the truth found in Scripture?:

God is a righteous judge,

And a God who has indignation every day.

If a man does not repent, He will sharpen His sword;

He has bent His bow and made it ready (Psalm 7:11-12).

This is the biblical picture of God’s love toward the unrepentant. His merciful love restrains Him from releasing the arrow that He has already drawn in His bow, the arrow that is tenuously aimed in righteous indignation at every sinner. This is a biblical example that would have fit right into Jonathan Edward’s sermons, or John the Baptist’s.

The unsaved inside and outside the church are under a huge delusion as they mistake God’s mercy for His approval. They will be shocked at their judgment, just like the goats Jesus described in Matthew 25:31-46. They don’t understand that God is very kind to His enemies, so they imagine that they are at peace with Him. What a tragedy it is when the church reinforces this delusion. I’m afraid that the bumper sticker that says, “Smile, God Loves You!” speaks volumes about modern theology and evangelistic preaching. Should we really be encouraging hell-bound rebels whom God utterly abhors, to smile

“God’s Love/Hate Relationship with the World”, the 2nd article on the conditional love of God ©2007 David Servant and ShepherdServe.org. You are welcome to repost this article as long as the article is unaltered and kept in its entirety (with all links and credits attached), and is not sold for profit.

Technorati Tags: Bloodshed, deceit, Enemies, Enough Space, Falsehood, Free Gift, Gilgal, God S Love, God's, Holiness, Inheritance, Lion, Love Relationship, Love/hate, One Reason, prince's, Rebels, relationship, Scripture, Sinner, Truthfulness, Unconditional Love, Wickedness, world

After a relationship ends in a bitter separation, partners look to form a new relationship, but this new association is nothing but a rebound. But what you need to understand is that such rebounds are short-lived. Such relationships are a natural reaction just like a knee-jerk. The most obvious motive behind the formation of such an association is that one of the parties is desperately trying to absolve his or her mind from the awful memories of a recent breakup, and most probably the same holds true for your Ex. So seeing your Ex with another person, does not imply that you cannot win back your Ex.

But you must also consider the position in which the other person is placed; in your efforts to win back your Ex, you should in no case try to hurt that person. In fact, that other person is stuck between you and your Ex without any mistake on his or her part. So be careful not to turn your feeling of love for your Ex into a feeling of hate for your Ex’s new partner.

In fact, the smartest move you can make after a fresh breakup is that you should leave your Ex alone for some time. You would be better off dropping all your efforts to win back your Ex and free yourself and your Ex to date anybody. If both of you are meant to come together once again, this consolidation period will do no harm. In fact, it will allow both of you to realize that even after spending time with others, you still desire for each others’ company.

Allowing a little breathing space to your Ex can be instrumental in your winning Your Ex Back. Meanwhile, both of you can start looking towards other people. As long as you don’t hurt anyone’s feelings, you’re doing fine. Hurting the feelings of your new partner is highly unethical and must be avoided at all costs, or the law of Karma will always catch up with you and even things out.

More Win Back Ex Articles

Technorati Tags: back, Consolidation, effective, ELSE, Free Date, Learn, Light At The End Of The Tunnel, love, memories, mistake, Motive, Natural Reaction, New Association, New Partner, Notion, rebound, Rebounds, relationship, relationships, Seeing, someone, spending time, They, ways, Win Free

The Mistaken Identity of Self Love: Let us first dispel some myths about what it means to love yourself. Self love is not about being arrogant, selfish, self-centered or egotistical. It is not about comparing yourself to others to determine if you are good enough. It is not about always putting yourself first. It is not about always getting your way. It is not about always winning. It is not about “only looking after number one”.

Will the Real Self Love Please Stand Up: To love yourself is to be in awe of the miracle of your existence. It is to accept yourself as you are – the light parts and the dark – and to love them both equally. It is to be willing to receive as much as you are willing to give and do both equally. It is about knowing your values and your boundaries and honouring them. It is about teaching others how to treat you by showing them how you treat yourself. It is about being kind to yourself. It is about looking after your mind, your body and your spirit – all three. It is about knowing you are worth it, not because of what you have achieved or what you look like or what others think of you, but because love is your birthright no matter what.

What Do You Most Need to Hear: Take a moment to think of those things you most need to hear from others. Whether it be that they love you, or admire you, or accept you just as you are, or appreciate you, or forgive you. Take a piece of paper and write them down. Make sure to exhaust your list. You will find that what you most want to hear from others is what you most need to tell yourself. You should now have a thorough list of positive affirmations tailor made for you. Repeat them every day, morning and night and you will soon discover a sense of self love and inner peace you never had before.

You Can Only Give That Which You Possess: It is an obvious statement that you cannot give something that you do not possess, yet so many people desperately love others without having or giving love to themselves. It is little wonder that in time there reserves of love are exhausted and their relationships falter. To give love you must first have love. To have love, love yourself. Only then will you be able to truly love others for the pure joy of loving them. Give the love you wish to experience to yourself and you will find all your relationships transform in miraculous ways.

There is But One Source of All Love: There is a single, intelligent Consciousness that pervades the entire Universe – all knowing, all powerful, all loving, all creative and present everywhere at the same time. It is the Universal Mind. It is the Source of All Love. It is Love. When you know and understand the Truth that you are one with the One Source of All Love – that your very essence is love – then you will have discovered unconditional self love and unlimited reserves for everyone and everything. You will know that to love yourself is to love the One Creator.

The Benefits of Loving Yourself: Self love is a win-win for all. It provides you with an inner happiness, confidence and peace of mind that is not easily swayed by outside events and opinions. It enables you to make healthier choices and the best decisions across all areas of your life from your intimate relationships to your finances. It allows you to truly rejoice in other people’s good fortune rather than wondering “why, not me” or even resenting it. It enables you to be more genuinely loving towards others and to be of greater service to the world at large. Ultimately, the more you love yourself, the more every thing and every one you encounter benefits. 

In a nutshell, loving yourself is a prerequisite to loving others. Your relationships are only as strong as the foundation of your self love. Release any belief you may hold that loving yourself is selfish or egotistical and replace it with the Truth that your very essence is love, that unconditional self love is your birthright. When you know that you are one with the One Source of All Love, that you are connected to every thing and every one, you will know that you cannot possibly experience true love without first loving yourself. You will have discovered the Truth that self love is truly the greatest love of all.

Find More Get My Love Back Articles

Technorati Tags: Awe, Birthright, boundaries, Different Ways, Existence, Golden Rule, Greatest, Looking After Number One, love, loving others, Miracle, Mistaken Identity, Myths, Neighbour, piece of advice, Prerequisite, Real Love, relationship, relationships, self, Self Love, self-esteem, Spirit

There is another way of looking at love that takes us in a healing direction. Although our romantic relationships may begin for all the wrong reasons, we must not become cynical about them because they show us the true nature of love and can help us to reveal the real us. As we fall in love we see our potential for successful relationships and for a life full of love. In the honeymoon phases of a relationship we see only the best in our partners and feel really good about ourselves. The truth is that we don’t have to restrict these feelings to the start of a relationship – we could be this happy and fulfilled at any moment in our lives.

To see how this might be, let’s look at the process of falling in love in a more positive way. Can you remember what it felt like when you fell in love? Think back to those heady days when you couldn’t stop thinking about your partner. Do you remember how perfect he or she seemed, how totally in tune they were with you and how connected you felt? You probably spent hours looking into each others eyes, talking endlessly and making love with wild abandon. It was all so easy.

It was this way because you allowed yourself to fall in love – during that time you let go of all your fears and negative ideas about yourself and the world. You opened yourself up to all the love that was available. You poured love on your partner and they poured love on you. Crucially you also received each other’s love without question. These romantic experiences show you what it is like to be free of our fear and insecurity and experience your true capacity for love and joy in a committed relationship.

The key to understanding what happens when you fall in love is to recognize that nothing new comes to you. The love was waiting beneath your fear and negative self-beliefs and it showed up when you let them go. When you fell in love it seemed that your partner was making you feel happy but what really happened was that you gave yourself permission to be happy. In that moment you made a subconscious choice to feel good. It is critically important in your understanding of relationships to appreciate that, no matter how much love your partner gave you when you fell in love, the good feelings were already present in you, before you met. The romantic process simply allowed you to access your natural capacity for love. What’s really exciting about understanding love in this way, is that you can find it again at any point in your life, without depending on another person’s presence or behavior.

As you can see, when we understand love in this way it transforms our relationships and our lives. Suddenly we realize that love isn’t an emotion that comes and goes – it is a description of our very essence. Love is who we are.

This profoundly different understanding of love explains so much about our romantic experiences and about life itself. We realise that our positive experiences within relationships are not determined by the amount of love we are given by another person but by the amount of love we can embrace – the amount that we can reveal our loving essence. Of course it is wonderful to find somebody who loves us, but this is valueless if we are unable to receive it. When we or our partner has low self-esteem, we do not know ourselves as love, and it is in this situation that fear and anxiety fills the void. We just won’t let ourselves feel love or be loved.

If we are honest, few of us believe that we are 100% complete when it comes to love. Even if we find somebody to love us and temporally fulfill our need, this does nothing to heal the underlying low self-esteem. It makes us dependent and highly vulnerable to loss in the future. Our neediness for love becomes very unattractive and through all manner of negative behaviors, we drive our partners away. The irony is that we have gone out into the world to find something that we have had all along! Of course, the key question to ask is why we would ever deny our true, loving identity. It seems crazy that we would turn away from something that is so life-enhancing. The astonishing truth is that we turn away from love because we are afraid of it.

When it comes to love, we are our own worst enemies! It is time to recognize our fear of love and intimacy and to begin to embrace it more fully in our lives. To do this we must dismantle the self-imposed barriers to the love that is waiting for us beneath our fear. The rewards will be extraordinary.

Related Get My Love Back Articles

Technorati Tags: ABOUT, Agony, Dependence, Disaster, Emptiness, everything, Fall In Love, Falling In Love, feelings, head, honeymoon, KNOW, love, love help, marriage, Presence, Real Love, relationship, romantic relationships, Sad Truth, Self Love, successful relationships, Those Heady Days, true love, True Nature, Turning

When you even just think about different things on how to win your ex back, you will usually hear and notice other people holding you back. This, you will take some time to listen to, especially during the initial stages but then in the long run, you will realize that you’re feeling incomplete and would rather have the feeling of being loved by Your Ex Back again.

It happens to most of us, along with it are its advantages and disadvantages. You can easily find tips on how to win your ex back from just about anywhere! The possibilities are endless, but there is also a risk for its assurance and security. The truth is, it will be a matter of choice between you and your ex if that person would want to stay with you. The drama of courting your ex to come back will also be dependent on the things you’re capable of doing, your ex’s personality and the length and level of your previous relationship.

First of all, knowing the real reason why everything did not work out the way you both had wanted should be the primary take on how to win your ex back. It would hurt at one point to think about your past but this is necessary to think things over. It takes great maturity to follow such process and you will be grateful as you will definitely learn a lot from these flashbacks. You will know the various reasons that will enlighten you on the reasons for break ups. At least you have a taken a step forward and reviewed where you might have gone wrong.

Have some time to introspect and wallow in your own feelings. Balancing your thoughts and keeping everything in place should be the first step in dealing with the process on how to win your ex back. At this point, you will be tempted to desperation and ask for that person back without thinking. This should not be since it will drive them away, doing more damage than good. Be cool. Keep cool and everything will fall in place. Make them realize that the person trying to win them back is the same person they fell in love with long before and that would be enough to have them start considering getting back together.

How to win your ex back can easily be accomplished by a positive strategy. Meaning, it will always pay being good and sweet to the person you have shared your life with regardless of the relationship at the moment. Remember, you both loved each other and that love is still there, you would just have to think about how to manipulate that person into always thinking good things about you both. Maybe then, he would realize that both of you were meant to be together after all.

Exuding a positive aura in dealing with how to win your ex back back is more than enough to make them agree to sit down and talk for a bit on how to deal with the situation. At this point they will see that they are dealing with a person they can easily to talk to and relate with. Hopefully that will be enough to help fix your relationship.

Technorati Tags: back, break ups, Desktop, Different Things, feelings, Flashbacks, how to win your ex back, Initial Stages, Macintosh, Macintosh Hd, Matter Of Choice, maturity, people, personality, Possibilities Are Endless, real reason, relationship, Risk, Simple, Simple Truth, truth, ups, Will Take Some Time

We spend so much time and energy searching for love. Single people can be zeroed in on “finding” love and coupled folks are constantly looking for signs that their significant other really does love them.

What we are really searching for is some indication that we are loved. We look to others to show us that we are lovable and to validate that we are loved. Well, guess what? We are loved. Always, all the time, no matter what, period.

Our journey is to understand that we are loved so that we can then focus on being loving. Being loving to everyone and everything around us. Yeah, that sounds schmaltzy but it’s true. It doesn’t mean to like everyone all the time and to enjoy every situation or circumstance of life. But when you know you are loved, you are more loving and understanding in every relationship and in every circumstance. That is a gift to everyone you crosses your path.

We seem so focused on the object of love, for example, the person with whom we are in a relationship. We spend so much time wondering, “Do they love me?” “Am I good enough for them to love me?” “Am I valuable enough deserve their love?” So much attention is given to this that we often miss the experience and the gifts of the relationship. Even if that relationship doesn’t last a lifetime, there are still many gifts in the enounter. Many times, the outcome of the relationship is more important to someone than the journey of the experience. So much is missed when we do this.

Truth is, we never really lose love. The object of love may go away but love never does. It comes from Source and Source never dies. It lives and breathes, is constant yet not necessarily consistent. It may change form or appearance but it is always the energy of love and it is available everywhere you look. First we must look within.

That old cliché of loving self first before someone else can love you…. Makes you want to gag but it is truth. Connect with yourself and your Self and expand that love. We fear losing love because we believe that it comes from outside sources. This is a lie. When you deepen your love of Self, the fear lessens because you know you are filled with love, you are more connected to Source and you know you are loved and lovable. You understand your own worth and value and you no longer need to have it “given” to you.

As you do this, you are able to spend more time being loving to others. Your relationships, friendships, etc are more rooted in the experience of being together, learning, sharing, enjoying each other and less about the outcome of the situation… marriage, friendship instead of romantic, etc.

How do you connect with your love of self? First, be aware of your self talk. Make a list of what you say to yourself. Do you say things like “I am so stupid!” “I can’t believe I did that!” We tend to be very self critical so, chances are you have some negative self talk. Create an awareness of this and stop the comments when they surface.

Connect with your gifts and use them often. Do things that make you happy and bring you a sense of peace. Write, paint, play with your pets or children, cook, whatever suits you. Taking time for you means you are honoring yourself and therefore loving yourself. If you don’t do this much, take a note of that and make some changes.

Spend more time with people who lift you and less time with those who bring you down. Take care of your body and spirit. Eat good foods. Exercise. Try yoga or tai chi. Meditate 10 minutes a day. Take a walk in nature. Take a long bath. Laugh all the time. Take care of you and you will expand your self love.

A woman was in a relationship recently and her partner moved thousands of miles away to take a job. She said that the last few weeks of their time together were the best ever. They got on beautifully, really enjoyed each other and were completely immersed in the love they shared. She didn’t understand why it was so good now that he was moving. It pained her that he had to go when their relationship had evolved to this state.

Here’s what happened: they let go of the fear of losing love because he was leaving. The object of love was being removed. They both knew it was going to happen and even had a date it was to take place. There was no fear of “is she leaving me?” “Does he really love me?” As a result, they had let go of the fear of losing the love and were able to totally relax into the experience. Her partner moved away and the love is still there. The love never left although the object is gone. THAT is the gift every relationship has to offer, regardless of the outcome.

The gift of love’s various expressions is available to all of us all of the time, to enjoy and embrace. Yet it must start with you. So, love yourself a little more. Have less fear of losing something you can never lose anyway. Enjoy each relationship for the gifts and magic it has to offer. Especially the relationship you have with you.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Technorati Tags: appearance, Circumstance, Cli, Crosses, Finding Love, Guess, Journey, Lifetime, Loved, people, relationship, Schmaltzy, Searching For Love, Signs, Stock, truth, Valentine S Day

In order to get back with your ex, you need to take advantage of 2 human needs that are present in everyone and in particular, your ex.  The first is the need for personal gratification and the second is the need for emotional fulfillment.  Let me explain.

A wise person once taught me this acronym, ‘WIIFM’.  You probably have heard of it.  It stands for ‘What’s in it for me’.  Everyone is basically selfish in a sense that he or she only does something when there is some advantage in it for him or her.  So after you have broken up, you stand a chance of getting your ex back only when he or she can find some advantage in renewing the relationship with you.  If there is no or little advantage or if someone else can provide a better advantage to your ex, you can wave goodbye to him or her.

What benefit or advantage can you give that someone else can’t or at least you can give better than someone else can?  Give your ex the best person that you can be.  In other words, improve yourself the best you can and give yourself back to your ex.

So review any areas of your life that need to be improved especially areas that contributed to the breakup.  Have you had a bad temper?  Were you unfaithful to your ex?  Were you too wrapped up in your own self-importance?  Were you dishonest?  Make the changes, no matter how small they may be.  You might even consider changing yourself physically in how you dress or look.  Make sure you improve your health by eating, sleeping and exercising well.  How about some new clothes or hairstyle?  When you get your ex back you don’t want him or her to receive back the same old unchanged you.

When your ex can see the changes in you and how it will benefit him or her, half the battle of getting Your Ex Back is won.

The other need people have is for emotional fulfillment.  This means meeting your ex’s emotional needs better than anyone else.  The ability to meet each other’s emotional needs is one of the most powerful ‘glues’ that make a couple stick together.  You must do that for your ex.  Otherwise, you may be able to get him or her back, but the relationship will not last and you may break up again in future.

So how can you meet your ex’s emotional needs?  Sociologists have discovered 5 basic love languages.  They are words, touch, quality time, giving gifts and acts of service.  Through one of these ways, we each communicate our love.  Some speak words of encouragement (“I love you,” “you’re the best,”etc), some like to touch, hug, cuddle and kiss, some want to just be there together with their loved one, some give gifts while others do things to show their love.  Whatever your love language is, it is also the way you like to receive love from your loved one.  Hence, you must know what your ex’s primary love language is and show your love to him or her through that way.  This is a surefire way to meet your ex’s emotional needs.

If your own love language is the same as your ex’s, then it makes it easier.  But if yours differs from your ex’s, it is still possible although a bit harder for you to meet his or her emotional need.  You just have to practice showing love through your ex’s love language rather than your own.

Immediately after the breakup, it’s useful to take a break from contacting your ex for a few weeks.  Use the time to do the 2 things above – improve yourself and practice meeting your ex’s emotional needs.  Once you have done so, then all you need to do is to find an opportunity to meet up with your ex again.  When your ex can see the changes in you and you can meet his or her emotional needs, you will be back together with each other in no time.

Technorati Tags: Acronym, advantage, back, Bad Temper, benefit, Clothes, Emotional Fulfillment, Find People, Hairstyle, Health, Human Psyche, Many People, Personal Gratification, relationship, Self Importance, Wise Person